Affair Aftermath & Holding Space for a Friend in Crisis with Christina Montalvo

August 29, 2019

**If you haven’t yet listened to episode #117 The 9 Year Affair: Lessons in Infidelity, I strongly recommend checking it out first as a prerequisite for this episode**

I’m a little bit nervous to release this episode, because I was a *little* bit more candid than I intended to be ????

Christina Montalvo and I have teamed up for our monthly joint episode that airs the last Thursday of each month, and today’s is different than usual.  Not only is it longer than our normal 60 minute episodes (but I promise it’s worth the listen), it’s even more personal and raw than is standard for us.

We’re talking about some of the after-effects of dealing with the fallout after finding out about the 9-years of infidelity that was happening behind my back in my previous relationship.

I need to stress something here: this process healing through this entire journey has not been pretty.  I’ve had a lot of people reach out to me since I went public with my story commending me for how I have handled things, and I’m so appreciative for the kind words and support.  But I think it’s very important to be incredibly transparent with you that I have had absolute rock-bottom moments, some of which I detail on this episode so that you can have a better understanding of what this has looked like.

Some of the things we’re covering:

  • When healing has looked incredibly ugly and painful: like my reaction when I found out about the secret house 170 meters from our driveway.
  • Some previously un-shared details that I never thought I would chat about publicly and a more open conversation than I planned on having around some very raw moments that have come with this process as it was unfolding in real time
  • How to support a friend going through a massive, life-altering crisis
  • When and how to listen, and when to offer advice
  • Showing up in the way your FRIEND needs you to – not the way you necessarily would want to be supported, we all have an individual process
  • Christina has been here for every single moment and detail of all of this right beside me and provided me a safe space to fall when I thought I couldn’t get out of bed in the morning – even with an international border separating us
  • We’re also going through some ways that you can move through your own healing process from any major issue that you’re struggling with (that don’t involve flying as far from one’s home country as possible)


Christina and I join forces at the end of every month to do a joint episode that airs on both of our podcasts, so if you love these episodes make sure to check out our previous ones:

Episode #24, Victim Mindset with Christina Montalvo

Episode #43, The Art of Maintaining Friendships with Christina Montalvo

Episode #79, How Your Money Mindset is Holding You Back From More Success with Christina Montalvo

Episode #88, Save the Drama for Your Mama with Christina Montalvo

Episode #98, Bridezilla: Our Unconventional Thoughts on Weddings & Showers with Christina Montalvo

Episode #104, The Tall & Short of It: How Your Height Changes Your Experience in the World with Christina Montalvo

Episode #112, Navigating Entrepreneurship: What Doesn’t Get Shared Publicly with Christina Montalvo



Room to Grow Podcast episode #117, The 9 Year Affair: Lessons in Infidelity

Room to Grow Podcast episode #118, The Dark Side of Social Media: Stalking, Protecting Your Privacy & Mental Health

Room to Grow Podcast episode #124, Liespotting: Detecting Deception in Everyday Life

Room to Grow Podcast episode #74, Celebrating Women Supporting Women: Girls Run the World!



Christina’s website

The Confidence Project Podcast

Iron Phoenix Strength Club outside Chicago, Illinois

Instagram @christina_montalvo


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Emily Gough Coaching

Room to Grow Podcast

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