Choose Your Hard & Living in the Light of Possibilities

choosing your hard

March 21, 2023

When we make decisions that we know are hard now, but will be worth it in the end, that’s choosing your hard. On the outside, what looks like hard work, messiness and sacrifice, means taking the time to properly grow the roots needed to live your most abundant, unshakable life. 

It can feel like hunkering down for a long, dark winter. But your winter won’t last forever, because spring always comes.  Those who achieve incredible things all chose, or are choosing, their hard. 

“Don’t live in the darkness of your doubts but in the light of your possibilities.” -Romy

In this episode, we’re talking about:

  • The difference between openness and vulnerability
  • Managing your energetic capacity
  • Seasons of life: winter and spring
  • Comparison and judgment
  • How to be comfortable being alone
  • How loneliness can exist even in healthy relationships
  • The challenges and rewards of entrepreneurship
  • Personal development and growth

What season of life are you in? How do you find ways to hold onto your vision, even when it feels hard? I always appreciate hearing from you – please reach out by email or DM me on Instagram @emilygoughcoach


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Instagram: @Emilygoughcoach


Website: Emily Gough Coaching

Podcast: Room To Grow Podcast


Episode 178 | The Stories & Trauma We Hold Around Money With Selina Gray

Episode 117 | The 9 Year Affair: Lessons In Infidelity

Episode 304 | The Sacred Liminal Space: Between The Familiar & Completely Unknown

Episode 302 | Self Love & Loneliness: Learning To Like Yourself

Episode 297 | Slowly, Slowly, Slowly, Suddenly: Setting Intentions For A New Year

Episode 299 | Embracing Your Winter Season

Podcast Producer: Adam Liefl


You have to kind of ask yourself, what do you want from life? Because one of the biggest differences between those who get to where they want to go versus those who don’t is holding onto their vision and making the sacrifices to get there. Cuz not everybody is willing to do that. Not everyone wants to choose their heart. I am Emily Gough, a human connection coach,

writer, and speaker with an insatiable sense of curiosity and adventure, always asking more questions and using the power of stories to teach, learn, and Grow. We boldly explore relationships, connection, and the nuances and complexities of the human experience with compassion, honesty, and a sense of humor. With both solo episodes and highly curated guests, sharing incredible stories,

experiences and expertise. The Room to Grow Podcast takes the entire idea of growth to the next level, all while covering the uncomfortable topics many of us would like to avoid. There’s always more room to grow. Let’s do this. Hey, Hey. Welcome back to The Room to Grow podcast Emily here and today’s episode, I already started to try to record this once and I started to cry.

So we’re gonna try this again. It’s interesting because I’ve gone back and forth about actually recording this episode. We’re, we’re gonna be talking, the overarching theme today is resilience. Okay? Resilience and choosing your heart. And I was reminded recently of the difference between openness and vulnerability. And I had an oh shit moment because I’m like, oh, I think I’ve actually been super open,

but not particularly vulnerable. So let me explain the difference between openness and vulnerability. Openness is when you, you share about something that you have already processed, you have already dealt with the thing you’ve already, you know, done, done your work on it. It doesn’t mean that there won’t be more work to be done on it, but you’ve, you’ve processed it like you are,

you are okay with it. So even though other people might think that it’s a super vulnerable share for you, it’s actually not that big of a deal because you’ve already accepted it. You have dealt with it, you have likely even moved on from it, at least partially you’re, you’re okay with it, you know, it doesn’t mean that it was like a good thing,

whatever, whatever the thing was, but you have accepted it. Whereas vulnerability is messy. It is raw, it’s chaotic, it is all over the place. And those are the parts that we don’t like people to see because we’re like, okay, well what, what will they think of us? Or they’ll judge us or shame us, or we don’t trust them.

We don’t trust every reaction. We perhaps don’t even trust ourselves to open up about the thing or whatever it is. Like I could go on all day about the number of reasons why we don’t share vulnerably and we’ve all had that experience. So as one example here, when I talk very openly about the nine years of infidelity that was going on in, in a former relationship that I was in,

people think that that’s super vulnerable for me to come out with. And, and it was perhaps, I mean, it was more vulnerable when I first came out with it initially, but even then I was, I was still just mostly being open about it because I had already spent months processing it. So when people think that that’s a super, super vulnerable share for me,

it’s actually not because it’s just, it’s just my story. Like I can’t, I can’t change it, it happened. I, I don’t live in that story. It’s just something that happened to go on in my life. Whereas vulnerability, there’s also, there’s also a degree of, of pressure when you’re in a leadership position too because, and I,

I’ve sort of talked about this perhaps at, at other moments in time, I know I’ve talked about this on Instagram before too, that there can be a bit of a battle and, and this goes on for every single one of us, but I feel like I’m even more conscious of it when I’m in sort of a, something of a, a leadership position because I want people to,

to leave this podcast feeling uplifted and, and everything else. And, and to not, to not feel like they have to deal with my shit. You know what I mean? Like that, that’s not, that’s not anyone else’s job as listener. And to be clear, you’re not going to be doing that today. You are hopefully going to be leaving up uplifted.

But there are, you know, if, if I’m having a bad day, I’m actually really particular about this. And, and my, my podcast editor knows this too, that if I’m having a shitty day, then he knows that he, I I let him know. I’m like, Hey, I’m not in a good energy to record today. I’ll have a podcast for you tomorrow just because yes,

I, I show I, I’m all about like showing up to do the work that needs to be done. But I also, no one ever, you know, we never want to project having a bad day and like negativity so-called onto other people. And this is partly why we have a bit of a loneliness epidemic going on because there are so many of us,

every, every single human, I would argue every single human. Maybe I’m wrong, but I feel like nearly every single human has had the experience of having, you know, going through a really tough time or a really tough period and keeping it to yourself because you don’t want to burden anyone else. You don’t want anyone to feel like they have to take something on for you.

You perhaps don’t feel like you have anyone in your life that you can trust to hold that space for you and to not judge you or shame you or, or whatever it is, right? There can be all kinds of reasons for that. And I am always very conscious of my energy because it is my responsibility to manage as it is for all of us.

We, we all have to manage our own energy and I always want to make sure that I am in a good head space when I do type these types of things at at least most of the time, you know, I can be having like a bit of an off day and I can still like record a great podcast, but if I’m like having a tough day,

I don’t, I don’t like to bring that. And as I’m recording this, it is spring here in the northern hemisphere. It’s turning into fall in the southern hemisphere, but it’s turning into spring in, in, in the, in the northern hemisphere. And it has also already turned into spring in my life. And it has been a long winter.

And by long winter, I mean like years, like five plus years of metaphorical winter in my life. And of course there have been beautiful moments in, in that timeframe. There have been lots of joyful moments and memories and and such beautiful things. I I wouldn’t trade any of it for anything. I wouldn’t trade any of it for anything. And it has been what I needed to become the person that I have and that I will continue to grow into.

I, you could pay me a billion dollars and I wouldn’t trade it. I, I would not trade anything that I have gone through. And it’s interesting because I’ve been doing a lot of reflection as I’ve moved into this and I have waited for it for so long and I, I kept thinking that it would happen sooner than this, like this, this metaphorical spring and like all of these things I’m like,

where, where are the things? Like I have the vision of where I know I’m going in life and like all the things I’m calling in, where is it? Coaches, mentors, friends of mine, they all are very aware of my impatience. And I’ve talked about my impatience in a variety of different aspects on this podcast as well. I, I feel like it’s one of the biggest lessons that I’m here to learn is to learn how to master my patience a little bit.

I’m not sure it’s working, but we’ll see. But it’s, it’s interesting because what this has brought to mind for me, and I’ve had a conversations about this with, with lots of people, is about choosing your heart. And I heard the other day, this is really cool actually, I heard the other day about there there’s this fig tree and I looked it up,

this is real. There’s a fig tree in South Africa whose roots are about 400 feet deep. And it’s because it took that much underground growth for the tree to secure a water source. And you know, roots will, will sometimes stop at nothing to, to seek that out because it is, is what is required for its survival. For the, for the,

for the tree’s survival, right? For contacts, fig trees. This is not normal for fig trees. Fig trees usually have a relatively shallow root system. But this one just kept going 400 feet deep root system because that’s how much it took for underground growth for the tree to be able to scare a water source. And to me that’s so symbolic of being deeply rooted and thriving and all of the growth.

And I know there are many, many, many people I have talked to that are, are entering a new chapter as well and coming out of a darker season. It’s, it’s a reflection to me of, or a metaphor perhaps of, of all the growth that has been necessary to ground myself, yourself so strongly in preparation for this next chapter. Because I can honestly say I’ve never felt this grounded.

Doesn’t mean that everything in my life is like what I want it to be or look like or or where I want to be or exactly what it is or any of those things. But I am grounded, I am calm, I am at peace. And these are ultimately the things that we actually strive for. You know, like yes, of course they’re the,

the more external things that we want and everything else, but if you had all the money in the world, if you had the relationship you wanted, if you had what, whatever it is that, that you seek in the world, but you had no inner peace, what would that cost you? What would that cost you? Now, having experienced peace,

because I don’t think that I truly understood what peace was or felt like because I had never experienced it on on these levels. So I kind of like knew that I wanted it and I wanted that feeling, but because I hadn’t fully experienced it, it was, it was perhaps a little bit harder to conceptualize. And now having experienced it, I’m like,

oh, nothing, nothing is interfering with my peace. Fuck that, fuck that. I will not trade this piece for anything. Like, it has to be the right things coming into my life, the right people coming into my life, like the right situations, alignment, like all of these things because I will not trade this piece. And when you are choosing your heart,

you have to kind of ask yourself, you know, what do you want from life? What do you want from life? Because one of the biggest differences between those who get to where they want to go is holding onto it versus those who don’t is holding onto their vision and making the sacrifices to get there. Cuz not everybody is willing to do that.

Not everyone wants to choose their heart. And the ability to do things today that are uncomfortable but will benefit our future selves is part of a concept called self continuity. So there’s been research around this, it’s really, really interesting. And it’s basically the idea that, that we, we, those, those who make choices that keep our future selves in mind and we make,

we make choices based on where we can see ourselves going and, and where we want to go. When we can actually like, visualize and empathize with that future self. It actually makes us more likely today, in present day to make choices in favor of that future self. And it’s called self continuity. And, and this is one of the reasons why things like meditation and visualization and stuff like that can be so powerful because when we can see our future selves as clearly and as presently as our current selves,

we’re more motivated to choose today what benefits that future self. Even if future self is like next week’s self perhaps, or next year or five years or 10 years or whatever. Like after all, why, why would we want to, why, why would we want otherwise? We would all just continue to go down the road of instant self gratification, which is ultimately the culture that we’re living in.

So it makes it even more extraordinary sometimes when we see people operating from a place of self continuity because we have, we, we can kind of continue to be trained to want the instant self-gratification. We, we live in an Amazon prime world, we expect everything delivered fucking yesterday. And then when it’s not, we’re like, what the hell, Jeff Bezos,

where is my shit? So we have to keep these things in mind. But you know, on a, on a personal note, and these are things I’ve never talked about publicly. I, I moved back in with family for three years, for the past three years when the pandemic hit. And during that time I also ended up in the darkest depression I’ve ever undergone.

I’ve, I’ve talked about that on the podcast. I was also still recovering from the very traumatic ending of my nine year relationship, more so than I perhaps realized at the time. Yes, I had done a ton of healing, I was in a, a relatively good place about it, but a lot more kind of came up to the surface that I needed to deal with.

I went into deep burnout. I also completely burned my business down a couple years ago and started building something entirely new, which always takes more time to build than we think it’s going to. It’s sort of this like slowly, slowly, slowly, suddenly piece that I have talked about before, that a, a coach of mine told me that years ago,

and it’s always stuck with me. And, and I mean to be clear, I’m also incredibly privileged to have had the option to move back in with family. But for someone who is fiercely independent, that was a major hit to my ego. And it’s one of the reasons why I’ve never talked about it publicly. Also for privacy reasons, I am incredibly private person,

both by nature and for a variety of reasons, including having had a stalker years ago. It, it’s just, there’s a lot of reasons why I am deeply, deeply private. You will basically never see me post geotagged things, things you will never see me post in real time. I’m very private about the people closest to my heart, where I am in the world,

all of these different things. So there are a lot of things that I don’t talk about that I’m not open about. I am a very open person, but I also am very conscious of the fact that I am still only willing to give the internet so much of my life. And so when I, when I had to move back in with family,

you know, part of the reason why that was such a hit to my ego for a variety of reasons, but I had a job since I was 14. I worked multiple jobs at one time for most of my life between the ages of 18 to 30. My record was four part-time jobs at once while I was in university full-time, I left home at 17.

I I moved back for just a couple years immediately after university to save enough money to buy a house. And then I was back to being on my own again with, with the house that I bought with, with my partner at the time. I have, you know, traveled the globe solo many times over and then all of a sudden the world is shut down.

I’m back living with family and feel utterly trapped by a lack of financial and geographic options. And it, it perhaps would’ve been easier in a lot of ways for me to go and get a job and, and rid myself of the stress of entrepreneurship, like always wondering how to make things work and, and all of these things. But everything has a price.

Everything has a price. I will always come back to that, you know, every single thing you choose has a price and you have to choose your heart. Like what is it that you want from life? And I could and and still can so clearly see my bigger vision. I instead chose to stay the course and to practice every single day. The patience and perseverance required to get there and to be clear,

like I still have to practice that every single day. And, and even once I hit, you know, the, the vision that I have currently, there will be another vision that I have by then that will require more patience and pace and perseverance to get to that next level. Like we will always be doing this, right? This is also why it’s so important to recognize ourselves for how far we’ve come and to give ourselves credit,

to show ourselves compassion and to celebrate the wins along the way as they come up. Like we have to appreciate the journey. Yes, holding the vision and and staying true to that is so important. But also don’t forget to take your eyes off the vision enough to appreciate the present moment If you’re always living in the future or conversely, if you’re always living in the past,

you’re gonna be miserable. You will be miserable. There are very few things I can promise you in life, but that’s one of them. We, we have to find balance with that and we have to recognize the power of the present. And you know what, it’s interesting, I I have two competing thoughts around entrepreneurship. For a long time I only identified with entrepreneurship being hard.

But there’s, and I’m gonna go into the reasons why, but, but there’s, there’s two schools of thought that I have on this. One is I’m like, entrepreneurship is fucking easy when we can, when like, not me, but like me when I compare it in my mind to heart, shattering tragedies that people go through and, and just the most heartbreaking things that,

that you can imagine, I’m like, entrepreneurship is fucking easy compared to that. Like losing a loved one, losing your health, undergoing some massive life-changing event in, in the, the most grief-stricken ways. Entrepreneurship is a piece of cake compared to any of those things. So I need to make that really clear and that is something I regularly remind myself of regularly.

And I used to only feel like entrepreneurship was hard and then one day I just sort of woke up with perspective. I’m like, Emily, entrepreneurship isn’t fucking hard when you think about all these other things in the world. My god, entrepreneurship is simple in comparison and, and it is a privilege as well and I’m always very conscious of that. But that’s,

that’s something to really keep top of mind. And that is not to take away from the fact that yes, entrepreneurship is also hard. It is hard. When people ask me about becoming an entrepreneur, I have one warning for you. It is one of the the hardest fucking things you will ever do in your entire life other than obviously all of these other things I have mentioned.

Because truly I really do mean that like entrepreneurship is so easy in comparison. But as we practice on this podcast regularly, multiple truths can all be true at the same time. They can all exist at the same time. So while entrepreneurship is incredibly simple and easy, it can also be incredibly hard. And if you’re looking for sunshine and rainbows entrepreneurship in it,

it has tested every boundary I have. It has pushed me to the edge more times than I can count. I have doubted myself, I have doubted the journey I’ve wanted to throw in the towel. I’ve wondered how the fuck to keep going. And I have cried so many tears since I started my business six years ago. I didn’t know it was humanly possible without dying of dehydration.

Like literally though it has required levels of courage that I didn’t think I had in me. It has required me to get comfortable with rejection in ways I didn’t think I ever would. And I still have to muster up and meet new levels of those parts of me with within myself every single day of this journey, including recording this podcast episode because I was aware that I was going to probably end up getting more vulnerable in this episode than I was comfortable with as opposed to just open.

I mean like, you know, every single penny I had was poured back into the business and investing in my own continued education and personal growth because I am my own best investment. I will continue to stand by that like saying no to going out trips, events, everything. I have also, I’ve never stated this publicly before either, but I have prioritized the business over dating and I teach about relationships I’ve dated pretty minimally over the past three or four years because romantic relationship is a very high priority for me.

But part of creating my own sense of safety and stability from within. For me this would not be the case for everyone. This is, I’m only speaking for me here, has been creating financial stability for myself and bringing my sense of purpose within my business to life and fully igniting it. And for me personally, that felt like a very necessary part of being able to show up as my highest self in a romantic relationship because I have old,

old wounding around financial dependence on men. Some of it is generational, some of it goes back to childhood for me. Like it’s very old wounding. And that that has been something I have been very clear that I needed to work out for myself. And yet, if my childhood’s up, despite all these things that I’ve said about entrepreneurship being hard, if my childhood self could see me right now and some of the things I’ve created and built,

including, you know, sharing deeply personal stories that younger like publicly, I mean that younger version of me would be in utter awe. And that that’s one of the reasons why I can speak with confidence about holding to the vision, the future vision. Because even though, you know, when I was a kid this, this wasn’t what I pictured for myself.

Like I’ve said this before, it’s like hilarious to me cuz I’m like, will I never sat down one day and decided to teach about relationships and name connection un until it became so obvious to me that this was what I was intended to do and, and it absolutely lit me on fire. And I also never sat down one day and was like, I’m gonna be a podcaster when I grow up.

That’s not a conversation that ever took place, but I just kept following the whispers of my life. And, and those whispers led to where I am now and where I am continuing to go. And, and for the record, when you hear creators or entrepreneurs or podcasters or or whomever say how much your DM or email means to them, that is not an exaggeration.

Okay? Sometimes that was literally the only breadcrumb that fed me for an entire month or more to keep going. And I had to make a single message of support, feed my self-belief and muster the courage to keep going until the next breadcrumb would arrive at some unknown date in the future. So seriously when when you hear people say that they mean it, they really mean like how much that means to them.

And I have always remained clear on the vision that I could see of myself and where I’m going, what I’m here to create the impact I’m here to have. It’s interesting too, I, I had, I had this conversation about choosing your heart. I’ve had it with multiple people, but I had it with a friend of mine about his marriage. And they have a meeting every Sunday to check in with each other just to connect,

like to see how each of them are doing, how each of them is showing up in their relationship, you know, is, is there room for improvement, like room for growth, all of these things. And it takes a lot of effort to be raising kids and, and still clear space in the calendar for an hour or two every single Sunday just for them.

But they’ve chosen their heart. It helps them connect on such a deep level that the difference is deeply felt when they miss a week, they notice when they miss a week. So do you want to set aside two hours every week to talk to your partner and co-create a healthy, thriving and happy relationship you both continue to enjoy and grow from? Or do you wanna wake up one day,

10 years from now and realize you’re both utterly miserable and get divorced? You know, that that’s, that’s just one example. But I wanted to give you another example of choosing your heart. Like a lot of times it, it is temporary pain for long-term gain. That is, again, that is not to say that you cannot enjoy the process. I want you to enjoy the process.

We need to, to find ways to enjoy the process. But this is gonna require sometimes patience, again, not my strong suit, but patience and being able to cultivate the ability to zoom out a little bit to see the larger picture back to that self continuity piece, right? Because even the seemingly tiny micro decisions that we all make sometimes can have a much bigger impact than the bigger decisions.

We won’t always know until much later how much those tiny little decisions actually had massive impact. Everything from skipping relationship talks because you’re tired and would rather watch the ballgame and having that add up to a divorce over the long term to deciding to go to a coffee shop one day and meeting the love of your life, right? Like these are the, the tiny decisions that can have massive ripple effects for better or for worse.

And how can you find ways to enjoy the heart sometimes? One of the ways I I measure choosing your heart and whether or not it’s it’s worth it is by chasing fulfillment. Not temporary quick hits, but chasing the kind of fulfillment that makes your cup overflow even if you’re fucking exhausted. And of course sometimes we’re still gonna choose like Netflix and chill and that,

that’s great. Like I do too. Say we all, we all do, like we, I’ve said this before, we cannot be in like constant growth, hard whatever mode 24 7, 365, right? But this is just bringing awareness and consciousness to these decisions that we’re making. And there’s a, a phrase that we’re all familiar with. Must be nice. And when you see someone,

and I want, I want to remind you of this because sometimes people are choosing their heart, but we can’t see it from the outside, right? We, we don’t see the outside the, the perspective that the person in the situation has. We only get the outside perspective and then it can be very easy to think like, oh, must be nice or whatever.

Especially with social media because we only see snippets of people’s lives. But when you see someone who has something you want, don’t be so quick to judge how easily something may have come to them either. And even if that thing did come super easily, I guarantee there are parts of their life you’re not seeing or don’t know about where they are struggling because everyone has their shit.

One example of this is a friend of mine whose business exploded to multiple six figures within the very first year. And one could argue, you know, oh it must be nice, but this person has also spent years and continues to in chronic pain and suffering one health problem after another. And I would not trade to be in their position for anything. And that’s just one example.

Like, I could give you examples all day, but that’s, that’s a very obvious one that that comes to mind. And when people make comments to me, which isn’t, isn’t that often, at least not to my face about, you know, must be nice or something when it comes to my ability to work from anywhere, to travel, to make my own schedule,

to do work that I find to be so completely and utterly fulfilling and, and how much I love my job. Yes, absolutely. All of those things are an enormous privilege I never take for granted. Especially because I worked many, many years in multiple jobs, especially my corporate job that I, I I was miserable at. I know what that’s like to get up every single day and to dread going to work every day for 8, 9, 10 hours.

I get it. But me creating these things in my life, sure as hell didn’t come for free either. So yes, it’s a privilege, but it did not come for free. And I’ve had to make a lot of choices and decisions to do things that others simply wouldn’t be willing to do. You’ve, you’ve probably, if you’ve listened to this podcast before,

you’ve, you’ve heard me say this again. My, my mom loves it when I share this story. She’s like, I’m so glad you’re passing on. My wisdom is, but I, I often come back to it cuz I think that it’s just so relevant. My, whenever, when I was a kid and I would, you know, want something that somebody else had on the playground or something like that,

my mom would always remind me, you, you can’t just pick and choose the good stuff in in your life, in their life. She’s like, if you, if you’re gonna compare and you want what somebody else has, you can’t just cherry pick the good stuff. You have to take all of their life. And every time that was stopped me dead on my tracks and I’m like,

oh no, I don’t wanna do that. I I do not wanna do that. And these are, these are the things that we have to think about. And sometimes choosing your heart is going to mean living an unconventional life, being the so-called black sheep in the family. Maybe you won’t feel a true sense of belonging in some places. It’s, it’s a lonely road to walk.

You know, when, when you go against the grain. One of the things that I think I have gotten exceptional at in this journey is I’ve gotten exceptionally comfortable with loneliness. And I’m okay with that because I think that’s actually a, a really important skill that continues to serve me in the long term. Because when we minimize our fear of loneliness and we learn to get comfortable in that space,

it does not mean you are going to be lonely forever. And it can feel that way. It can absolutely feel that way when we are in it, trust me, I’m very aware it, we, we can feel like it’s never going to change, but loneliness is a battle that every single human will have to face throughout their lives. It’s not something that you just deal with once and then you figure it out and you never feel lonely again.

You can be in the best, most fulfilling, happiest, healthiest, most thriving relationships in the world like romantic, platonic and otherwise. And you will still have moments of being lonely. So the sooner you can learn to deal with your loneliness to manage it when it comes up and to understand the wisdom that loneliness is offering you, the less scary it becomes.

And you may actually also start to deeply appreciate your periods of time when you are alone and alone and lonely are two very different things, but sometimes people avoid spending time alone because they’re terrified of being lonely. You can also be surrounded by the, the people closest to your heart and feel lonely as fuck. So we have to really manage how we approach loneliness and to understand that it’s something that all of us are going to manage and,

and have that all of us are gonna have to deal with at one time or another. And what I want to finish with here is a beautiful quote from one of my, my dearest, my nearest and dearest mentors, Romi. And she said, don’t live in the darkness of your doubts, but in the light of your possibilities. And I want to leave that with you because when you’re thinking about choosing your heart,

when you are trying to hold onto the vision that sometimes feels like it’s slipping away from the corners of your mind because you’ve been disappointed so many times before and it feels like it’s so far away and maybe other people don’t believe in you and it can just feel dark, right, the darkness of your doubts. But choose someti. Sometimes choosing your heart is going to mean actively choosing to live in the light of your possibilities and to hold onto that even when it can seem almost unreasonable to do so.

Because no one else is ever going to believe in your vision like you are. People can believe in us and, and give us, and, and they can believe in our vision too, but, but they’re never going to believe in it as strongly as, as we do. People can, can give us, you know, a boost and, and they can,

they can offer their support and all of these amazing things. And that’s so important and a lot of times we need that sometimes, especially on the harder days. But if you are in your winter right now, I want to assure you that your winter will not last forever. It will not last forever. Spring eventually comes because it always does. It always comes at some point or another.

We can’t always predict when it’s going to come the same way we can predict when spring is arriving in nature around us, you know, with like a, an arbitrary date on the calendar. But spring will come and hold on to that vision that you have for your life. So thank you for, I’m glad that I hit rerecord because I did not cry this time,

so I’m pretty proud of myself. Not that crying is bad, I don’t mean that, but I was just hoping to not burst into tears on this episode, so I survived. So let me know how this sl for you. I’d love to hear from you on this. Tell me what season you’re in. Tell me what season you’re in and, and how you find ways to hold onto your vision even when it feels hard.

Let me know, I’m over at Instagram at Emily Goff coach, or you can always send me an email at info Emily Goff There are various ways to work with me as well. And increasingly more so I have like more and more things coming down the line, including a number of workshops around intimacy that I’m going to be co-hosting that I’m very excited about.

So I don’t have anything posted publicly for that just yet, but stay tuned and if you want to be the first to know, make sure to, to jump on my email list. I send out an email every Sunday with like a thought, things about relationships. Sometimes I send you like some podcast episodes to listen to stuff like that. And you can,

I’ll also send you a free gift when you sign up of my 15 page guide called Where Do We Begin All About How to build the foundational, your entire foundation for healthy, thriving relationships, even if you’re in Winter. Okay? So all the information is in the show notes or you can jump over to Room to grow Thank you so much for listening as always,

and we’ll be back soon. Thank You so much for listening. If you want more, one of the most common questions I get is where do I even start doing this work to create deeper connections and better relationships? I’ve got a free 15 page guide for you called, where Do We Begin? This is the very foundation that you need to start building healthy relationships with others and with yourself.

This is my gift to you and multiple people have referred to it as life changing. You can find it over at Room to grow or check the show notes to go download it and have it sent straight to your inbox. Thanks so much and stay tuned for more episodes weekly.


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Create the kind of relationships that make your entire nervous system breathe a sigh of relief as you think to yourself, “this is what it’s supposed to feel like.”